Hello, Sunshine.

Extra credit is offered in my psychology class for students who are willing to participate in graduate research studies. (Of course) I signed up, and have been assigned to a stress diary study. Basically I went with other students for an introduction, and then we’re on our own to fill out daily stress diaries for a few weeks. I have to write about my most stressful daily experience and then rate it from low to high.

It has been quite revealing, because while the study is not for me, I’m fascinated by my own stress levels. (I’m also reminded to diary daily about the positive events, as opposed to the stressful ones, because it really is a powerful marker.) In the past, when I saw a doctor or spoke with people about my life, whenever asked about stress I would chuckle and remark that I didn’t have anything to be stressed about. Yet I notice as I fill these little diaries out, every single day I’m clicking the buttons for “extremely stressful.” Why am I having so many level-ten days of stress? Yikes.

So once I acknowledge the stress, the next level is: err…. what the heck do I do about it (since I don’t like yoga)?

I’m thinking a triple edged approach: 1) manage existing stress, 2) relieve stress, 3) stop worrying so damn much and get over it. I’m taking baby steps and reading up on productivity to implement a great organizational system for myself. I can feel it falling into place. I’m also creating time for play and sleep and fun. And I’m letting go, bit by bit… Certainly a PROCESS though so I’ll keep ya updated on this one.

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One thing I took away from reading Eat Pray Love is a consciousness to fulfill my needs and desires. To seek pleasure in my day to day life and to cherish it and nurture it. Perhaps waking up early and cuddling in the covers with a book instead of jumping out of bed with stress. Or going for a walk when it’s sunny and warm, even though I have a lot of things to do.

Today I’m totally feeling the need for goodness. All I want to do is put on some warm sweatpants and hide in my awesome bed with some tea. I want to watch high quality television and talk to my (hilarious) sister on the phone and laugh. I want to take a hot bath and then put on warm pajamas and eat vegetable soup. I want chocolate and only really nice people. I want comfort.

My nerves are still raw from allowing my body to elevate to such levels of [insane] stress. I want to take care of myself and to rest. To not think. To not worry. I strive to find the balance with nurturing myself in what I need and want, and also getting school work/life work accomplished. I certainly don’t wish that I didn’t have school. Cuddling in bed doesn’t feel nearly as indulgent and fantastic if it doesn’t come after a busy day of productivity. And I’m madly in love with chemistry and everything else I’m studying. I just desire a balance and rhythm to the madness. (I am finding one…I just want it all worked out now!)

Regardless of if my life is in perfect balance, I can savor even the smallest moments to be good to myself, to feel the sun on my face, taste my food, and to melt into the covers each night with a silent “thank you” for my day.

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This is the trailer for the movie How to Cook Your Life.

“When you’re cooking…you’re not just working on food, you’re working on yourself. You’re working on other people…Food will taste better when the cook is joyful.

Cook mindfully. Infuse your food with joy and love.

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I was thinking today about how when I bought most of my groceries from Whole Foods, I would watch prices meticulously and cringe while I waited to see the total. I would hold my breath as each item was scanned, and I would feel relieved if it was less than $50. It’s close to impossible to walk out of Whole Foods without spending at least fifty dollars. While I tried to remind myself that I was purchasing really good quality foods to support my health, I still felt guilty about how much it cost and like it was way too much money to be spending on food.

Since I have shifted to shopping primarily at local markets, that whole price issue is gone. I don’t cringe while the farmer adds the total. I don’t feel resentful when I hand over my money. If anything, I feel surges of gratitude where I want to hand them extra and tell them to keep the change! I love spending my money at the farmers market.

For one, I like knowing that my cash is going straight into the hands of the people who grew it (with the small percentage paid to the market). I like talking to the farmers, learning about them, how they like to enjoy their bountiful produce at home, and where they’re coming from. I like that my money is supporting the local economy and the person who deserves to be profiting actually is. There is no billionaire CEO taking a cut from my kale purchase.

Groceries at the market cost less too. I know I could walk out having spent as much as at Whole Foods, but I’ve learned tricks to avoid that (buy in bulk, avoid the processed stuff). The whole experience feels good. It’s one of my favorite parts of the week and I love feeling like a part of the community. I love that there is a farmer who knows what kind of lettuce is my favorite and will pull it out when I walk up to his stand.

I love being connected to the people who grow our food. What is really more important than that?

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This is absolutely hilarious. It’s crazy that J.K. Rowling revealing that Dumbledore is gay would create such a media frenzy. Since you know… he isn’t real.

[image via Best Week Ever]

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I’ve settled into this local eating thing and it feels really good. I have used up almost all of the vegetables in my fridge so I’m very ready for the market, but I still have so much fruit left! I hardly made a dent in my huge box. Luckily apples and pears keep beautifully in the fridge.

One of my most delightful surprises was this guy:

After awkwardly peeling and chopping it, I steamed it. It only took a few minutes. I mashed the cooked pieces with a fork and they took on a whipped consistency almost immediately. I put a little coconut oil, cinnamon, and agave on it. Ammmmazing! I’m definitely not a fan of squash, but this is just delicious.

I am so thrilled with the ease of not having to go to the grocery store several times a week. Market lettuce lasts for one to two weeks, while the grocery store stuff can rarely go past one. I’ve also been eating vegetable soup, big salads embellished with fresh veggies, apples for snacks between classes, and big pear green smoothies in the morning. Non-local stuff has been chocolate, flaxseed oil, and food eaten at restaurants/friends houses.

YUM!

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Many hours, one case of hives, several chocolate bars, three stomach aches, 18 hours of sleep over four days, two anxiety attacks and midterms are over!

I went into this quarter with grand plans to avoid all stress around tests and assignments — and I failed.

I have learned a huge amount about myself in this past week, and a bit about chemistry and math too… but mostly I am aware of many ways I can and should be using my time more wisely. While I certainly studied a lot in the weeks leading up to mid-terms, I think it was more “activity” based than “action” based. What I mean is I made a dramatic point that I-was-busy-because-I-am-studying, but that time that wasn’t always used in an effective manner.

I distinguish now a difference between sitting with a textbook and reading the words, and truly reading it to absorb and learn the material. The latter takes MUCH longer, which is probably why I always skipped it. (You know, in grade school everyone “speed reads” because that is the marker that you’re SMART, even if you don’t have a clue what the heck you just read. Not so smart anymore…)

I survived regardless. Did really well on the chem test. (which was probably the most scary!) the verdict is still out on math, but I have a feeling I might be putting in many extra hours for that this time around… unless the curve saves my ass.

I promise myself I will never ever ever conduct studying in such a manner again, or allow such an unnecessary degree of fear and worry to infiltrate my life.

c’est la vie, and I should probably start preparing for round #2 which starts in three weeks! I bought the book “Getting Things Done” as a friend recommended it to me. Since my exams ended, I’ve taken a few days to sleep, eat, watch tv (online) and relax while organizing my work space. I need to set myself up for success this time around, and I’m excited to do it!

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Since I just posted about 3iying, I want to share a couple of these excellent videos, with real girls discussing the connotations of ads. One of the things I love about these videos is it encourages people to look at an ad and ask, “What is this communicating to me, or to my daughter/sister/friend/mother/aunt?”

About a lifestyles ad for a woman’s sex product:

A perfume ad geared towards young girls:

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I really like this idea.

It’s called 3iying. I haven’t had time to read all the details, but the basic idea is they are a bridge between advertisers and the real world, composed of real young women, who are communicating everything wrong with current advertisements. Then, their business is to help companies communicate with new millennium girls. Ah it’s about time.

[Thanks to Steph at Back in Skinny Jeans!]

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Let’s discuss this controversial PETA ad featuring a naked Alicia Silverstone. There’s also a video PSA to match. This debuted several weeks ago, and initially I was more or less apathetic to it. I didn’t get why Alicia had to be naked and all, but I generally like her and I like when celebrities use their status to promote vegetarianism.

However upon recent consideration, I realized that if the image were tagged with any other headline for a different company, I would be appalled at how the media had once again put a female into a subjective and sexual position looking like a piece of meat. Hmm… is that the point? I think the point is that this is a spawn of their “I’d rather go naked than wear fur” campaign. While I appreciate what PETA has done for animal rights, their objectification of women is disgusting. Perhaps it is all for the shock effect since “sex sells” and everyone else is doing it. But, had this read: GAP or Victoria’s Secret or Prada, I would think it was ridiculous. Why is promoting vegetarianism any different? I suppose my mind rationalizes that this is for a good cause. But regardless of the cause, it’s still the message “If you do/take/try/eat/drink THIS magic product, you will be thin/smart/popular/rich/fit/hilarious.”

So I’m totally torn. I’m biased too, since I already am a vegetarian. Despite my reservations, I’m glad this is out there and gaining attention. It makes people think.

I would rather though if it showed a really vibrant Alicia Silverstone outside animals and some catchy music, still looking great and probably getting the message across even louder and clearer. (And I would leave it to the media experts to make it not as corny as my idea may sound)

What do you think?

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