Hello, Sunshine.

noon Wake. Drink water. Stumble around

12:15 Rebound on mini-trampoline for a while (in pajamas & sports bra).

1pm Make juice. Or eat fresh fruit (in pajamas).

2pm Watch TV. Sister wakes, joins you.

2:30 Help sister make breakfast

3pm Shower. Dress in something comfortable, or put pajamas back on

3:30 Watch TV. Wake dog from nap. Pet

4pm Snack

5pm Sister naps. Venture outside, decide its too hot, return inside

6pm Snack

7pm Watch TV or sports with Dad. Try not to look bored. Surf web.

8:30pm Eat dinner

9pm Consider calling a friend. Forget while pacing around

9:35 Pet dog. Coo.

10pm Watch TV with sister. Laugh.

2am Bed

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In January, as part of my self-care plan, I quit formally exercising. It was a hard mentality to shake off, because I was so used to berating myself for being inconsistent with fitness, it was very weird to have permission to not exercise. Now I am fully aware of both the health benefits of exercise, and the sanity benefits I personally notice, so I never planned to give it up for good…just to give it up until I naturally felt like doing it without any “shoulds” or nasty self-talk.

So this week, I am staying with a friend, who just happens to have a small fitness room in the apartment complex. On Monday I felt compelled to take a trip to the workout room. I was a bit hesitant, but exercise is really about convenience for me, and all i had to do was walk down some stairs. Getting on the treadmill and beginning to walk slowly felt really good. I walked a little faster, and then slowed down again when that felt right. It was a wonderfully liberating experience to be on a treadmill and to experience my lungs clearing, my blood flowing, and my skin sweating just for the sake of doing it. I didn’t focus on the distance covered, calories burned, or what speed I “should” be going. I focused on feeling my body move fast, and then to feel it move less fast. To not be pressuring myself or yelling at my body to do things it doesn’t want to do. Exercise feels amazing!

It is particularly enjoyable when I have given myself permission to only do what feels good. Almost every day since then I have taken some time to go to the exercise room and to move and stretch. I also didn’t go when I didn’t feel like it.

Tonight I had a particularly empowering experience where I went down in the evening to walk for a bit before dinner. I had been studying for finals all day, and I needed to move my body a little bit. So after like three minutes I was NOT feeling it, but I also didn’t feel quite ready to give up. I decided to go until the five minute mark and then stop if I didn’t want to continue. I know that sometimes it takes a minute for exercise to feel good, so I walked faster and into a (slow, incredibly slow) jog. Normally I walk the entire time and jog for about 2 minutes total, just to increase my sweat. But tonight jogging just never stopped feeling good, and I ran for EIGHT minutes. Now… this is significant. For a gal who hasn’t voluntarily run more than two minutes in.. my life? I ran a whole freakin’ lot. The significant part of the story though, is that it felt SO GOOD. Running has always been extremely uncomfortable for me, so I was perfectly happy to never do it. But tonight, to feel my body actually like something that I have always believed that I wasn’t capable of doing. Well, that was just extraordinary.

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[cozy like these baby ducks! thank you shesnuckinfuts via flickr.com]

Last week my mom and sister came to visit, overlapping with my final exams for winter quarter. It was overwhelming to say the least, alternating between family and school mode, then jumping right into entertaining the fam the moment school was done. So, when they left on Sunday, it was time to find my cozy time. I’ve been taking this entire week to recharge my batteries for spring quarter.

So what does cozy look like?

It looks like doing whatever the hell I want.

For example, yesterday I stayed in my pajamas all day long. I re-discovered my joy of coloring, and have been doing grid/mosaic prints while listening to music round the clock. I alternate between by bed and desk, watching Oprah, talking to friends on the phone, or cooking up the most basic of meals. I’m choosing my pleasure about all else, neglecting errands that probably should be run, and simply recharging. Not thinking, not working, not worrying.

Just being.

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does this sound familiar to you?

as you stroll into campus bopping along to the rap/zigazigah section of the Spice Girls “Wannabe” a very musically inclined jazz-clubbing friend appears out of nowhere and asks what you listening to.

…silence…

“Oh… nothing much,” you respond, (*slip ipod into pocket*) Ani Difranco bootlegs. (awkard pause) How are you?”

I was thinking today as I walked to class, separating myself from the crowd with my ipod and headphones… I wonder what other people really listen to when they walk? Are they really all listening to incredibly cool, inspired, unique stuff, or is it really Britney and Christina?

so I wonder… should we be more open with our musical choices or should we conform to the guidelines that we may listen to what we choose yet always emit an air of musical knowledge, quality, and snobbery.
no one needs to know I have a whole playlist of Disney songs. That sometimes when someone makes eye contact with me on the bus, I smile because it’s the best part of “The Circle of Life.” no, that’s just for me to know.
perhaps we’re all walking around listening to Disney, Vanilla Ice, and Britney Spears and nobody is brave enough to admit it.

(I tend to have ponder intense philosophical things like this right about now, when my brain reaches the point of maximum saturation with psychology vocabulary and limit laws)

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From the brilliant creator of Fat Rant, here is the newest video from the fabulous JOY NASH. I’m just posting for now, commentary to come later.

Want more Joy Nash? www.fatrant.com

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Did you read the Babysitter’s Club books? I sure did.

I read just about every one. I had nightmare’s from Claudia And The Phantom Phone Calls . I printed fliers for my own babysitters club, even though it was just me, and put them in the mailboxes of my neighbors (even though they didn’t have any kids). I even wrote a letter to Ann Martin telling her how much I loved her writing (wow i really forgot about all this).

and I never once realized the essence of 80’s they were overflowing with until I discovered this: What Claudia Wore. You can imagine my delight when I discovered a blog entirely devoted to babysitter club fashion. An excerpt:

“Claudia was lying on her bed with one leg propped up on a pillow. She’d broken that leg a few months earlier and every now and then, especially if rain was on the way, her leg would give her some trouble. She looked absolutely great, though, pillow or no pillow. Her long hair was fixed in about a million braids which were pulled back and held in place behind her head with a column of puffy ponytail holders. She was wearing a t-shirt she’d painted herself, tight blue pants that ended just past her knees, push-down socks, and no shoes. From her ears dangled small baskets of fruit. She’d made those, I knew. She’d found the baskets and the fruits at a store that sells miniatures and dollhouse furniture. Claudia amazes me.”

Continuing on, with a little intro to what Mary Anne and Dawn are wearing…

“Mary Anne was wearing a short plum-colored skirt over a plum-and-white-striped body suit. The legs of the body suit stopped just above her ankles, and she’d tucked the bottoms into her socks. I don’t know where her shoes were. She’d taken them off. The neat thing about her outfit was that she was wearing white suspenders with her skirt. I immediately decided to use some of my hard-earned Arnold money to buy suspenders. And maybe a pair of push-down socks like Claud’s. Or, if I became rich, to copy Dawn Schafer’s entire outfit.

Dawn was wearing this cool oversized (really oversized) blue shirt. One of the coolest things about it was that it was green inside, so that when she turned the collar down and rolled the sleeves up, you could see these nice touches of green at her neck and wrists. She was wearing a green skirt - and clogs. I’d never seen a person actually wearing clogs, just photos of people in Sweden. Dawn was the only kid in school who could get away with wearing them. She is so self-possessed.”

emphasis mine.

It just get’s better and better! this is amazing. Check it out.

(** I discovered this blog through this post on Kate Harding!)

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a little collection of things I adore online… with no theme or reason.

• Tonya Kay. Dancer/Environmentalist/Raw Vegan/Beautiful human being actively living sustainabley on Earth. She has awesome energy, I love reading what she has written and hearing her in interviews. Check out her forum, lots of fantastic information on everything from health to driving on vegetable oil.
• No Impact Man. The name says it all: living with minimal impact on Earth.
• The Rotund. Do you know what the size acceptance (also know as the fat acceptance) movement is all about? This girl will tell you in beautifully written and insightful posts.
• perez hilton. should i be embarrassed to admit that this is where i piss much time away? should i ? can it be on a list with these amazing and inspiration human beings? err, probably not, but sometimes I need to get away from thinking and he helps me with that.
• RFC. Raw Freedom Community Forums. A little forum blurb in this huge internet with lovely people with wise knowledge about healthy living.
• Freecycle. Post to give away and receive, the only stipulation is everything absolutley must be free. Find your city and you can find everything from sweaters to lawnmowers to books to bed stands and moving boxes. Time to get out of this “must buy everything new” mentality and stop accumulating crap. Give old things to people who need them, and find what you need for free!

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Tonight I was with some friends brainstorming ideas for a comedy CD. There were several hours of creativity and laughter, and now I’m just buzzing with good vibes. It affirmed to me how essential laughter is, and how easy it is to be missing in our day to day lives. I’m amazed at how GOOD I feel, how alive and vibrant I am right now. So here is a little info on laughter…

The many benefits of laughter
1. When you make fun of yourself, you disempower those who would make fun of you and disarm possible confrontations.

2. Laughter dissolves tension, stress, anxiety, irritation, anger, grief, and depression. Like crying, laughter lowers inhibitions, allowing the release of pent-up emotions. After a hearty bout of laughter, you will experience a sense of well-being. Simply put, he who laughs, lasts. After all, if you can laugh at it, you can live with it. Remember, a person without a sense of humor is like a car without shock absorbers.

3. Medical researches have found that laughter boosts the immune system. The study of how behavior and the brain affect the immune system is called psychoneuroimmunology. Though still in its infancy, this science is rapidly gaining much attention as mankind strives to understand the mind-body relationship.

4. Laughter reduces pain by releasing endorphins that are more potent than equivalent amounts of morphine.

5. Humor helps integrate both hemispheres of our brain, for the left hemisphere is used to decipher the verbal content of a joke while the right hemisphere interprets whether it is funny or not.

6. Laughter adds spice to life; it is to life what salt is to a hard-boiled egg.

7. Develop your sense of humor and you will find you are more productive, a better communicator, and a superior team player.

8. Everyone loves someone who can make them laugh. The more you share your sense of humor, the more friends you will have.

9. Humor brings the balance we need to get through the turbulence of life comfortably.

10. Laughter is even equivalent to a small amount of exercise. It massages all the organs of the body, according to Dr. James Walsh.

11. A sense of humor can help you accept the inevitable, rise to any challenge, handle the unexpected with ease, and come out of any difficulty smiling.

The above list is from Benefits of Laughter Therapy

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I am seriously inspired by Joy Nash’s message to love the skin you’re in. Something that is easily talked about, but her video puts it to action. This video is something of a youtube phenomenon. Joy is approaching 1,000,000 hits, and has been covered by CNN, Fox News, Inside Edition, and others. I don’t agree with everything in the video, but it is overall totally inspiring and very refreshing.

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I’ll be the first one to admit that I rarely read novels. Prior to Eat Pray Love the last novel I read was probably in early high school. If I’m not reading texts for school, I prefer to read books about nutrition, heath, body image, manifesting, ect. Something about the title of Eat… caught my intuitive eye, and I slowly started to read it. “Slow reading” quickly turned into more of a loving obsessive affair where I poured over the pages, earmarked my favorites, stayed up with it until past 2am, and fell thoroughly in love with the author and her story. I decided about a quarter of the way through it that I also needed to tell everyone I know about it because everyone needs to read it! I guess other people feel the same way about it too, because it DID rock the New York Times Bestseller list. I hate to admit it, because I like to think I’m not corny like this, but when I finished the last page I slowly closed the book and gave it a hug, just holding it to my chest and saying “thank you” for entering my life. (Okay, i guess I am incredibly corny like that. But who cares!)

Eat Pray Love is the true story of the author, Elizabeth Gilbert, leaving her unhappy marriage and figuring out what she wants to do for the first time in her life, seeking pleasure, spirituality, and a connection to herself while she leaves her chaotic NY life to travel alone.

What I can say in my experience of reading this book, is it ignited a deep desire in me to ask myself what would make me feel good, to feel connected to the world, to be happy.  It made seeking pleasure and joy a main priority in my day. It also reminded me of the beauty and power of prayer (more on this later).

 I worry if I write too much, I will somehow do a disservice to this amazing book, so I will leave this review short and sweet and just give a whole hearted 100% recommendation. (I would even recommend buying it - something I’m definitely not into - but I want to have this book for a long time, to write in it, etc.)

If you click the image of the book above, it’ll take you to Amazon where you can read other review etc.

 Rating: 10/10

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